The most important relationship that we cultivate in this life, is the relationship with ourselves. However, a great deal of the time we are much more concerned about our other relationships. We often put ourselves and our needs on the back burner and focus on our external relationships. Of course it is beautiful to love your family, pets, friends, and life partners, there is no denying that. What if during your quest to find love, you discovered that YOU could be the love of your life!
We live in a world where we search for validity outside of ourselves. There is a constant need to be accepted and liked by others. We are constantly questioning whether we are good enough, smart enough, wealthy enough, and the list goes on. Isn’t it exhausting? Look at how much energy we spend on seeking the approval from others, when the only approval needed should really come from within! Sadly, this has been the conditioning of society for such a long time that it seems perfectly normal. If we can learn to really love ourselves, we would not be constantly seeking love outside of us. The insecurities and self-doubt that run rampant within the majority of us would simply fade away. Doesn’t that sound so amazing! That thought just makes you want to take a deep breath and say; ahhh yes of course, this is what has been missing all along! Why does it feel so obvious that self love is the path to liberation? Because your soul, the very essence of who you are, knows this to be the absolute truth!
Breaking old habits and belief systems can be a challenging task, and one that needs to be approached with patience and love. Start by making a list of positive aspects about yourself. Let this list be endless! Just keep it ongoing in your journal and when something pops up write it down! Start spending some time alone. Being alone and being lonely are two absolutely different concepts. In fact when you truly love yourself, you will never be lonely again! When we spend time on our own, we begin to learn about the things that WE like to do. There is no need to seek approval outside of ourselves, because there is no one around to ask! Practice the art of loving yourself unconditionally because we are all perfect and flawed at the same time! Tell yourself every day; I love you, I accept you, I appreciate you.
Taking care of and loving yourself is not selfish or ego based, although I know that you may feel that coming up for you in this process. That is because of your old belief system of looking externally for what already exists within you. Now is the time to break free of those patterns. When you cultivate a loving relationship with yourself, all of your other relationships will flourish. We can only truly love another without conditions, when we love ourselves. Otherwise, we keep putting those same conditions and expectations on others. If we base our happiness on others, we will be disappointed every time. It is never too late to create a new pattern of living and thinking. Be the love of your own life and watch the magic happen!